I've had a few beers and a pizza.

Very odd, I wrote the title, then left it for a bit and in the meantime decided not to drink alcohol. In part because if you are going to piss off the British Equestrian Establishment by pointing out that they are the most massively institutionally racist organisation in the world, you'ld damn well better be sober when they attack you.
So I'm not drinking, and surprisingly it doesn't really bug me, no mad cravings, no massive fights with my conscience and I've left a few lagers chilling in the fridge just to see if they are going to worry me.
I find it very puzzling, I gave up smoking from a healthy 60+ a day habit some 8 years ago now and I'm still waiting for the withdrawal symptoms and with alcohol, no twitching so far, yet my life is happily falling to bits around me, the question of whether I need psychiatric help is still open and I have given up a serious alcohol consumption level without problems.
Of course the getting you off your addiction industry love to make it sound really tough, so you need their services, and maybe I will one day, but for now, I think a cup of tea, or a tomato juice is the answer.
Simon

Stumble It!


It never fails to amaze me how many people actually wade through all the stuff I write, and don't get me wrong, I am deeply complimented, so in honour of all you lot, here's a total rewrite so you can read it all again without getting bored.

Some of the more perceptive may have picked up a hint of frustation with the British Horse Establishment. My opinion hasn't changed. If they were horses, I would say they must have been cruelly mistreated as youngsters, because no horse is naturally devious, vicious or deceitful. And no horse is naturally snobbish, racist or in favour of incest, all characteristics that appear throughout the British Horse establishment. The section on "horsey people" has a number of my rants on this subject.

Over 8 years I have become, accidentally, and by very strange degrees, a pony trainer, and I have decided to apply what I have learned about ponies, to people, specifically, you, my audience. The first thing I do with a strange pony, is stick my thumb in its mouth, and this just isn't possible over the internet, not even on Broadband. But the principle is interestingly the same. You are getting a flavour of the way I write, which gives clues as to my thought processes and attitudes. In the same way a pony gets a taste of me, when I stick my thumb in its mouth, and within seconds it is licking and chewing and trying to get to grips with this weirdo who has just turned up, unloaded heaps of gear, and clearly wants to do something threatening.

Threatening is the relevant word. What I do with the Saddlechariot clearly threatens the British Horse Establishment, and their defense mode is, conveniently for me, demonstrated on video by Zara Phillips in the LandRover advert apparently "supporting British Eventing". I say "apparently" because the advert is very simple, and you can watch it here; I just don't see how it supports British Eventing.

Zara Phillips turns up, ready to unload her horse, and a group of young men are having a kickabout with a football. One, a fit, agile, jack the lad, definitely fancying himself as a ladies man, and with good reason, decides to chat up Zara Phillips. His comment that there isn't much skill in riding, Zara just has to sit on top and look pretty, is hardly earth shattering. Lets face it, how many riders come in sides heaving, lathered up and foaming at the mouth. Any way, Zara Phillips, says nothing, looks down her nose at him and then her horse showers his face in snot.

What has this guy has done to deserve such humiliation? Would it be funny if it was done to a person of colour, or who was disabled? In what way does this support British Eventing? But I am not here to discuss the thought processes of the great and the good, I just thank Landrover for a graphic example of the way I, and many other equestrian businesses are treated by the British Horse Establishment. Simple, they look down their nose, refuse to talk to us and let their minions shower us in snot. Been there, had it done to me for 8 years.

The British Horse Establishment is threatened because I have produced a vehicle and harness system that is safe. You see, if I am right, they are wrong, and that threatens their whole dominance of "equestrian affairs". Not only that, my Saddlechariot is easy for complete novices to drive in safety, which rather stuffs the whole concept of "horsey people". The Saddlechariot provides a real purpose to animals that have been relegated to companion status for years and brings back the idea of ponies actually being useful, which of course threatens those for whom riding and equestrian activities are all about asserting status. I never meant to, but this is the equivalent of walking up and kicking them in the gelding area. Their only viable option is to destroy me.

With a pony that feels threatened, (and putting a vehicle on them is, for most animals, a threat) it is vital to teach them to get past the feeling of being threatened. Patience and gentleness are the only options. I use pressure release but I have seen some stunning work with positive reinforcement, aka clicker, bridge and target etc. But before I get to the specific training, I work on straight leadership. This is probably the easiest thing in the world to train, and involves walking away from the animal and leading it.

The concept is simple, the leader does what it says on the box, leads. The follower follows. How difficult is that? With ponies, the vast majority just follow me, but that is mostly practice. I have done it so often, I behave like someone who expects to be followed. And this is easy to learn. Think of all those upper class twit officers who could step out of a trench into a hail of machine gun bullets and their men would follow them from a nice safe trench to death. You don't need anything like the same confidence and courage to get a pony to walk across a yard, just use the posture and the walk. (I am full of respect for those officers. They knew what they were walking into, and their casualty rate was appalling. I have less respect for those who sent them, and their men, to die.) I go further into this whole concept in TRAINING.

Establishing leadership is not about domination, it is about trust. You are saying, trust me and nothing will hurt you. Remember this. It means YOU can't hurt the pony. And you can't do something that might hurt the pony. This is where the Saddlechariot scores. I can put almost any animal in a Saddlechariot in under two hours because at any stage I have an exit strategy. Even when I have hitched up the Saddlechariot, traces, breeching, false belly band all done up, at the first sign of fear, or even worry, I can pull the release and let the pony go, unhurt, unscared, undamaged. Then we start again.

But the horse training analogy has one problem. I can show things to ponies and horses, and they look. They may not understand what I say, but they can understand my actions and will let me put a vehicle on them and for choice I do it ground hitched. I will not have an animal held firm while I put a Saddlechariot on, it has to be allowed to walk away, so I know it has CHOSEN to be in the vehicle. But how do I stop the British Horse Establishment being terrified? They won't answer my letters, they won't let me demonstrate what I can do, they have blinkered themselves and are thrashing around in the dark, hurting everyone. I don't think going up to them and sticking my thumb in their mouth is going to work either.

Any suggestions gratefully received, and for anyone who wants to see the Saddlechariot and what it can do, try stopping me demonstrating it.

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The Saddlechariot is safe because I am a coward and proud of it. I don't need to care if you hurt yourself, I think about me. I drive the Saddlechariot, and I really matter. Cowardice gets a consistently bad press, yet as a design tool it is unparalelled. "A coward dies a thousand deaths." Yes, but only in our imagination. I can live through imagining my death. The real thing is less fun.

The British Equestrain Establishment preserve all the courage based traditions which reached full flower in the pointless slaughter in the North Valley at Balaclava. I will from quote the opening chapter of Cecil Woodham Smith's "The Reason Why", an investigation into why two enormously brave but fundamentally incompetent upper class twits, both considered unfit to lead a regiment, were allowed to waste the best horsemen and the best horses in the world.
"Military glory! It was a dream that century after century has seized on men's imaginations and set their blood on fire. Trumpets, plumes, chargers............to ride victorious through flower-strewn streets.... It was not a dream for the common man. War was an aristocratic trade, and military glory reserved for nobles and princes. Glittering squadrons of cavalry, long lines of of infantrywheeling obediently non the parade ground, ministered to the lust for power and for display. Courage was esteemed the essential military quality and held to be a virtue exclusive to aristocrats. Were they not educated to courage, trained as no common man was trained, by years of practice in dangerous sports? They glorified courage, called it valour and worshipped it, believed battles were won by valour, saw war in terms of valour as the supreme adventure."

The 7 Earl Of Cardigan and the 3rd Earl of Lucan survived.
Of the 700 men who went into the North Valley, 195 came back and about the same number of horses. Cecil Woodham-Smith again. "The wreckage of men and horses was piteous. "What a scene of havoc was this last mile -- stewn with the dead and dying and all friends!" wrote Lord George Paget. Men recognised their comrades, "some running, some limping, some crawling", saw horses in the trappings of their regiments "in every position of agony struggling to get up, then floundering back again on their mutilated riders". So, painfully, step by step, under heavy fire, the exhausted bleeding remnants of the Light Brigade dragged themselves back to safety."
"Dragged themselves back to safety" When I talk about safety I mean safety, not survival from total horror, and the risk that the same idiots with the same philosophy will take you straight back in again.

I am a coward and I want to offer equestrian activities to those who aren't insanely brave, or stupid. The Crimean War didn't see the end of upper class courage being seen as a virtue. Here is the 1911 Encyclopaedia Brittanica 11th Edition on the subject of Carriage Driving.
"Under all these different conditions driving is a work of utility, of economic value to civilised society. But from very early times driving, especially of horses, has also been regarded as a sport or pastime. This probably arose in the first instance from its association with battle."
195 survivors from 700. A sport or pastime. I think I will stick with utility which has its own heroes.

Working class horsemanship has left few records because working class horsemen were paid to do a job, and not paid enough to pay afford literary self glorification, but a few examples are preserved. "Half a dozen laden waggons" says Sir George Head "are dragged along the railroad to the particular drop then at work, by a stout cob, which is then ridden carelessly back again, barebacked by a small boy, at a shambling trot; notwithstanding that the interstices between the planks below admit, here and there, full two inches of daylight. However the pony proceeeds, clattering on unconcernedly, otherwise than by holding his snout close to the floor, the better and more cautiously to observe where to place his feet at every step.
.............The beast when I witnessed his performance, had only a halter on his head, without winkers, or any harness except collar and light rope traces. As soon as the boy had fastened the lock of the trace to the foremost waggon, the pony invariably turned round his head, as if to enquire whether all was ready,and then, exactly at the proper moment, commenced his march, the load, meanwhile, rumbling after him: arrived at the drop, the carriages being detached, he here stood jammed close to the wall; shewing perfect cognizance as the carriages passed him, of the degree of attention due to the various noises and manoevres going forward, and not only being aware when it was proper to step out of the way, but how long precisely it was safe to stand still."
This was at the Drops at Middlesborough, huge elvated buildings extending over the mud into the Tees where coal from the Stockton and Darlington line could be loaded on ships before the docks were built. So a boy is handling one horse pulling half a dozen waggons, each carrying two and a half tons, in light coming up from the gaps in the floor boards, doing precision work in a cramped and unbelievably noisy environment, with just a halter and the permanent threat of maiming or death.
This is horsemanship at an incredible level to us today, yet in 1839, when T.H. Hair's Sketches of the Coal Mines in Northumberland and Durham was written, such natural horsemanship was obviously commonplace, but only among common people. Hair notes that the boy is only using a halter, no bit, no blinkers, no whip and relying on subtle communication cues and perfect trust between the pony and the boy. Yet only a few years later Anne Sewell would write Black Beauty in an attempt to wean the upper classes from their enthusaiam for bits, whips, bearing reins, blinkers, cruppers and the other devices the upper classes needed to drive an animal in fresh air and safe surroundings, while some underpaid boy could produce brilliant horsemanship in the dark and dust and noise and danger without all that nonsense.
I don't want to put ponies or children back is such appalling working conditions, but I can honour the skills, and most importantly, the bond built up between ponies and people. The boy and pony survived because they could trust each other, and that trust and friendship was all that made an otherwise hellish life bearable for both. If the boy survived long enough to have children, would you say they came from a "horsey" background? I would. Would they fit into the Pony Club? Only by denying their father's skills.

For example, here is a piece from William Fawcett extolling the virtues of the "horsey" set. "Above all, see that your instruction is given to you by instructors certificated by that excellent body the Institute of Horse, and not by grooms, whose ideas are hidebound by conservative traditions and who, more important still, cannot impart knowledge, and are, as a class, bad horsemen."
The British Horse Society is the result of amalgamating the Institute of Horse and Pony Clubs with the National Association of the Horse, and presumably full of people who are "as a class, good horseman".
It is with this schizophrenic British horse world that I have so many problems. Cardigan is remembered for his courage, which was enormous, but a boy working for a pittance, every day, in the dark, with his common cob, facing massive risks; where are his memorials? Who is preserving his skills and traditions? But then as a class, he and his mates were "bad horsemen."
To discuss Safety you need to get rid of the snobbish, stupid nonsense that has masked true horsemanship in Britain for the last few hundred years and look at all horsemanship, not the lethal attitudes of a few upper class twits.

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The Saddlechariot is safe, and so it is reasonable to ask what the British Equestrian Establishment think about it. Unfortunately they don't. I'm not saying they don't think, though I have my suspicions, they don't think about the Saddlechariot, they don't look at it, talk to me, answer recorded delivery letters or let me show it to them.
In any other industry, lawyers would be leaping around, queueing up to fight the simplest restrictive trade practice going. But then getting a Queens Counsel to look at organisations whose patrons are The Queen, Prince Philip and Princess Anne is a touch optimistic.
One organisation, the Country Landowners Association have had the moral courage to look and indeed to publish their opinion. I am enormously grateful to them for having the courage to look at and assess the Saddlechariot. I apologise for the grief I am sure it has brought them, for breaking ranks with the Establishment.
It is rather depressing as a UK citizen to realise that I am not allowed to show my invention to the Societies that claim to represent my industry. It is also depressing to realise that any loyalty to "my" country is rapidly evaporating. So if you wonder where the seals of approval, and test certificates are, sorry. To get those you have to persuade the organisations who claim to be in charge to actually look at the product.

The Saddlechariot is a pony/horse/donkey/mule drawn vehicle. As such it is only dangerous when it is attached to an animal. So to make it safe, you need to be able to detach it. With the Saddlechariot, step off, pull ripcord. You aren't on the vehicle, the vehicle isn't on the pony.
A very simple, two stage , safety policy. Get off the vehicle, which involves stepping back 8 inches and down 8 inches. Pull rope. So the training manual says, "If you are worried, step off, pulling ripcord." 8 words. I am not even going into why you are worried, it could be the credit crunch or Amy Winehouse's hair style. If you are worried, you aren't concentrating on your driving and would be a lot safer off the vehicle and with the vehicle off the pony. Traditional two wheeled horse drawn vehicles are called traps. The Saddlechariots isn't a trap because you can get out, and so can the pony.
The British Horse Establishment are absolutely convinced you need a servant, and they are so right. Cleaning the house, mucking out the pony, doing the shopping, sorting out the washing........the list is endless. But actually driving a pony, why do you need a servant for that? They claim it is for safety. I saw a driving accident with a BDS approved vehicle, with a young girl acting as groom. When the horse, for whatever reason panicked and started kicking the vehicle to pieces, a rapid process, the poor girl fell out and got kicked in the face.
If I am driving, I am quite capable of worrying about myself. I don't need any extra responsibility. And what can a passenger do when things go wrong. Not a lot.
Obviously highly trained professional grooms are a different matter. Have a look at a professional driving with two grooms. Now look at me deciding that I don't, for whatever reason (and I agree about Amy Winehouse's hair), want to be on a pony drawn vehicle any longer.
The other safety factors are less relevant. Stainless steel TIG welded construction, assessed by Lancaster University Engineering Department. The vehicle doesn't break, deform, bend or corrode under any normal load and was assessed at three times predicted load before any structural deformation. This means probably 40 stone man, 40mph cross country before it starts to bend. You will have to be heavier and faster to break it.
I don't use spoked wheels or solid tyres, at least partly because I have noticed the start of the 20th Century. Spoked wheels are big blunt scissors for removing children's and animal's limbs. Solid tyres are........I can't think of a polite way of putting this......stupid.
The Saddlechariot is designed to brush past people, and is designed with the traces outside the shaft tips so obstacles including people are brushed out of the way. Protruding shafts are lethal weapons.
The Saddlechariot is light weight. Getting hit by light objects is less painful. Surfaces are curved, and the latest version has foam bodywork because if you get hit, soft doesn't hurt as much as hard.
The harness breaks almost everywhere at about 40lbs pressure. I can make an unbreakable harness, but if the harness doesn't break, your pony will. If that is what you want, I don't want you as a customer. The Breeching strap is the only part made strong. If the saddlechariot is hit from behind by a car, I want my pony pushed by a webbing strap, not lumps of metal. The breeching strap is around half a ton breaking strain.
But my whole philosophy is safe not brave, safe not impressive, safe not traditional. Safe is all I care about, but suprisingly, with safety, comes fun. There is a classic saddlechariot grin, the first time a complete novice canters on a saddlechariot, normally within ten minutes of getting on the vehicle, or to be honest within two minutes.
Becuase the Saddlechariot is safe, learning is easy.
I sell safety, becuase it is a simple commodity, in very short supply in the traditional horse world. The fun is free. I can't make you have fun. All I can do is worry and think and plan and redesign to make you safe, because that is a goal I can achieve.


There is a principle which is a bar against all information, which is proof against all arguments and which cannot fail to keep a man in everlasting ignorance—that principle is contempt prior to investigation.” – Herbert Spencer

Establishment

I have been trying for some time to split the Saddlechariot website in half, so those interested in what it does, and how, can look at that, and those interested in the history and philosophy can look at that, but I cannot get the division to make sense. I have finally realised that it needs a third section, to describe the extraordinary behaviour of the British Equestrian Establishment who for 8 years have pretended I don't exist, while allowing their minions to trash my business, and my life.
Click here to find out what they have done, and why. Otherwise the total lack of expert opinions, official demonstrations and media coverage looks very odd indeed. The fact that I have a brilliant vehicle for the disabled and no UK based horse or disability organisation will even look at it, is an awful lot odder.


So back to the Saddlechariot. First what it isn't. It isn't a Carriage or a Gig and I can prove it isn't a Trap because both the driver and the pony can get out of a Saddlechariot and you can't get out of a trap. Here is a video of getting off a moving Saddlechariot and removing the Saddlechariot at the same time, and not a servant in sight.

The saddlechariot is a SAFE, one person, pony (donkey, horse, mule, zebra) drawn vehicle, built to modern safety standards, built to modern animal welfare standards and quite specifically designed by me and not intended to look as though it was designed by somebody's great, great, grandfather.

It is fun, fun for ponies, fun for people.

It doesn't look impressive because I didn't build it so I could go out and impress people. It doesn't have huge, wooden spoked, solid tyred wheels so I can sit up high and look down on the common herd. It was designed between 2,000AD and 2,008AD and to a modern designer, big spoked wheels are big blunt scissors, just waiting to mangle limbs where children, dogs, ponies are present.

It is a chariot, not because it has been dressed up to look like Hollywood's idea of a chariot, but because it performs the functions of a chariot, a high speed, one person, unsprung, all terrain vehicle, which allows small ponies to pull adults at speed.

It doesn't need a groom because I don't have servants and I would look pretty silly carefully designing a vehicle, and then having to go down to the job centre to hire a groom to help me. If you have servants, there are hundreds of vehicles designed for people just like you.



And combined with Natural Horsemanship, it makes driving ponies and horses SAFE and EASY. I can put a green animal in a Saddlechariot in under two hours, without pressure, without cruelty and without any risk. I've done it a lot quicker but I like some leeway.








As a working class revolutionary, I have many failings. The wrong accent and an inherent dislike of hard work don't help, but the whole Saddlechariot website makes no sense without an explanation of why I am a (very bad) working class revolutionary.
Luckily Landrover have produced a viral advert which perfectly demonstrates the way the British Horse establishment trest those they don't like.

The Saddlechariot is different. Safety is the paramount consideration. And since I am scared of horses, ponies, mules and even donkeys, I assure you I am not going to build a vehicle that I can't get off easily, and that I can't remove from the animal instantly. This video of Boyd Exell driving at Aachen where he falls out of the vehicle, then both grooms fall out of the vehicle leaving four loose horses towing 600kg of vehicle through crowds of spectators. Alternatively, look at this video of me stepping off a moving saddlechariot and removing the vehicle from the pony. I could hang on to the reins if I chose but it makes the whole thing clearer if I just step off. Anyway a loose pony, with nothing attached is more of a threat to grass than anything else.

The safety is reflected in the engineering. The structure is TIG welded stainless steel, which makes for near zero maintenance. Design is modular so the saddlechariot can be adjusted to fit any animal from 7hh to 18hh and I can do bigger or smaller with a weeks notice. Not only does it fit any animal, it fits any driver over about 6 years old and balances perfectly without adjustment. That means NO weight on the shafts.

Lancaster University Engineering Department provided stress testing and advice to bring the Saddlechariot up top modern road going vehicle strength standards. There are no official tests for vehicle safety that I can discover. NFU Mutual Insurance describe the saddlechariot as "a glorified horse drawn vehicle but with extra safety mechanisms fitted" and accept it on a satndard horse policy without need ing a groom. NFU Mutual also provide insurance cover for the British Driving Society whose vehicles do require a groom.

The harness is my own design utilising a unique aluminium collar with sheepskin cover. This provides a perfect fit and a bearing surface between the collar and pony that stops any rubs. The latest versions have an integral swingle tree in the collar which makes life even easier for the pony at speed across rough ground.
The saddle is double hinged, has 20mm closed cell foam padding under sheepskin and there is no weight on the pony's back. The tailored padded breeching is built for strength

Nelson Mandela and Mornington Crescent tend not to feature in horse drawn vehicle corporate blurb, but the Saddlechariot is different. For the last few months the Saddlechariot site has been a marvellous tribute to "caring conservatism" functioning as my own, online, "care in the community" so I could have a very public nervous breakdown. It makes a nice change from drunks lolling in the gutter to save the NHS a bob or two, now everyone can go global with their problems, paranoia and delusions, with the massive advantage that most of us don't then invade Iraq, Afghanistan and wherever it is that we are invading this week.
On his release from prison, Nelson Mandela said of those who had put him in Robben Island, and kept him there, "I don't hate them because if I hated them they would still be controlling me." Just listening to his reported words loosened the chains of hate that have been wasting my time, and wasting my life. My problems are nothing to those Mandela faced, and I am not trying to draw any parallel, merely expressing my thanks to Mr. Mandela for his example which has helped me so much.
Mr. Mandela's words allowed me to look at my problems clearly, not through a fog of hate, and I saw the British Horse Establishment in all their glory playing a rather more vicious and much less funny version of Mornington Crescent. For those who haven't enjoyed "I'm sorry I haven't a clue!" I can only say please listen to at least one episode. "Mornington Crescent" is a truly British game involving the four players on "I'm sorry I haven't a clue" saying the names of London Underground Stations until someone says Mornington Crescent. Humphrey Lyttleton chaired the proceedings introducing abstruse and arcane rules and rituals and the players endlessly questioned his jurisdiction and the fine print in the rules. The joke is, that that is it. Once you know it is all a game, you can laugh at those outside the charmed circle who just can't get it, and congratulate yourself on your wit and erudition. But the charm of all those concerned, and their comedy genius made this simple formula a delight to all listeners for nearly thirty years. Yes, for thirty years a game with completely fictitious rules and no point, has entertained millions, and The British Horse Establishment over 80 years has done pretty much the same, with meaningless rules, archaic dress codes and snobbery.
The British Horse Establishment, if you are accepted, is, I am sure, full of charming and witty people, but to an outsider, it is "Mornington Crescent" without the genius and without the charm. Complicated and abstruse rules are insisted on with no background of logic, and once you are in the charmed circle, the rules no longer apply. The joy for those in the charmed circle is how easily you can keep out the riff raff.
For example, cantering on the roads "No mater how much you enjoy cantering, remember the horse's well-being. The canter should only be attempted on suitable ground, otherwise the horse's legs will be jarred. Soft ground is best and you must never canter on a road surface." I was brought up with the absolute rule that you don't canter on the roads, until I went hunting for the first time, where all the people who insist you don't canter on the road are doing exactly that, but it is all right because they are hunting.
Blinkers are vital if you are going to drive a horse. The reasons why they are vital vary according to who you are talking to, but they are vital. The Royal Horse Artillery gave up using blinkers before 1857 and don't use them to this day. Are the Royal Horse Artillery particularly stupid and permanently crashing because of a lack of blinkers? Or is it possible that the rule is nonsense. Anna Sewell, author of Black Beauty thought blinkers were a dangerous fashion accessory, and every small horsey girl reads Black Beauty, they just shut their eyes when they come to the bit about blinkers. One of my Lancaster university contacts said the reason horses have to wear blinkers is so they have the same narrow viewpoint as their owners.
On the right is a page of a book for novice horse owners. It might just make sense if you are completely ignorant, but those in the know are well aware that Thoroughbreds boast of their descent in the male line exclusively, and in the female line predominantly from ARAB blood. So you start a Thoroughbred at one and wait till the notoriously late developing Arab is 5 or six, you must either assume that the whole Thoroughbred pedigree is total nonsense or that the rules don't apply to rich and aristocratic race horse owners but must be enforced on any peasants.
Yes it is Mornington Crescent, it just isn't that funny. The reason they have to say that you can start Thoroughbreds at one combines tradition, stupidity and cruelty and is therefore supported whole heartedly by the establishment despite the fact that vets have insisted it is stupid and cruel since Captain M. H. Hayes FRCVS wrote "Points of the Horse" in 1903.
Pages 345 to 355 of this highly regarded work are a sustained diatribe against the January 1st birthday applied to all Thoroughbreds and the habit of pushing them to race too early. And guess what. Nothing has changed, but books now claim that you can start the Thoroughbred at one. Typical Mornington Crescent. Invent a pointless, idiotic rule, and insist it is both sane and sensible. But in the Equestrian establishment game, the horse is the loser.
Captain Hayes also comments on Showing horses. "A false appearance of flatness and strength of back and loins, and of roundness of barrel, may be temporarily given by "show condition" (excessive fat)." And guess what, to win at shows today, excessive fat still gets the prize. Since excess fat is the chief cause of laminitis, and laminitis is the major avoidable medical problem in ponies, and horses, you might think the show world would listen to common sense, but after 105 years they carry on regardless.









The Saddlechariot is different.

The Saddlechariot is different. This website over the last few months has been a classic case of "care in the community" as I have had an online nervous breakdown. It is all available on Blogger so those who feel I have been rude can read all about themselves as often as they like. As I said, the Saddlechariot is different, forget all the usual boring "unique selling propositions," "unbeatable offers" and "massive discounts", here you just get confessions of mild (in my opinion) insanity. But a combination of Nelson Mandela, Richard Dawkins and "I'm sorry I haven't a clue's" "Mornington Crescent", has solved a lot of my mental problems. If this unusual concept doesn't interest you, you can go straight to the Saddlechariot pages and find out what it does when attached to a horse, pony, donkey or mule going through surf or city centres, across rivers or hills, pointlesslessly zooming around or providing a practical eco friendly power source. Click here for normality or continue the strange journey through a stranger mind. Nelson Mandela's comment that he didn't hate those who had subjected him to 28 years prison on Robben Island, because "If I hated them, they would still control me," has liberated me as well. The British Establishment, Equestrian section, have sent me to Coventry for 8 years, insulted me, trashed my product and done their best to destroy me but since I no longer hate them for it, they no longer control me. The relevance of "Mornington Crescent" should really confuse my overseas readers. Mornington Crescent is a delightfully funny game played on the brilliant "I'm sorry I haven't a clue" Radio 4 programme, which consists of four people taking it in turns to say the names of London Underground stations until someone says "Mornington Crescent". Humphrey Lyttleton presided, allowing arcane challenges and introducing random, abstruse rules. The fact that it was truly pointless was the joke, and it lasted for 30 years. The British Horse Society has lasted rather longer but is essentially the same. A series of pointless statements, weird rules, arcane challenges and the joke is that the rules don't actually apply to those who belong, only to those who want to belong, and when they finally get the joke, they can play it on the next generation who want to belong. Richard Dawkins is not just a brilliant biologist and enthusiastic teacher of Darwin's evolution and all the science that has developed from Charles Darwin's, I hesitate to use the word "revelations", but Dawkins has successfully challenged the God botherers with an analysis of their beliefs. The British Horse Establishment in all its ludicrous pomp and glory shares a vast amount with organised religion. Fancy dress and fancy language harking back to a golden age, an inherently exclusive attitude to those who aren't God's chosen people, or riders, and a self interested subsevience to the powers that be. But their power is entirely dependent on a belief that they know what they are talking about. Horsemanship is truly global, crossing every boundrary, every religious, cultural, ethnic and social barrier. So why should a bunch of upper class twit habits, dresscodes and language, control English horsemanship? 100 years ago 99% of horsemanship was working class horsemanship. Horsepower meant exactly what it said. The Equestrian Establishment has preserved every peccadillo of the upper class twit activities, polo, dressage, hunting, carriage driving, while relentlessly destroying all memory of the myriad skills of those who actually worked with horses. It is a joke, and a very bad one. I don't hate them any more, but I feel nothing but contempt for their attempts to exclude so many from "their" activity and to deny the "horsey" background of so many. I will take ponies to anyone who would like to work or play with them. I didn't start building Saddlechariots as a working class revolutionary, but I ended up as one, just another working class revolutionary but with a very unconvincing accent. I claim the British Horse Establishment make a series of pointless statements because I have read their books and heard their comments, and seen them in action. I was always brought up with the firm belief that you never canter on the roads. Everyone out hunting canters on the roads. Those who taught me "never canter on the roads" were the first to do exactly that out hunting. Why does "hunting" make it all right? Driven horses must wear blinkers. The Royal Horse Artillery stopped wearing blinkers, (or at least their horses did) after 1815 and before 1857. For over 150 years the Royal Horse Artillery haven't used blinkers yet they are considered vital for anyone who drives, according to the British Driving Society. Anna Sewell, author of Black Beauty, considered blinkers a dangerous fashion accessory yet they are still de rigeur in smart driving circles. One of my Lancaster University friends suggested that "they fit blinkers to the horses so they have the same narrow viewpoint as their owners!" There is an aristocracy amongst horses and blood will always tell. Absolutely true. The General Stud Book, the Debretts of the equine world, recording the pedigree of those equine aristocrats theThoroughbreds, was started because the aristocrats involved in racing in England in the 1700's had such an appalling reputation for running ringers in weight for age handicaps, that some way of keeping those devious shifty crooks (aka the British peerage) on the straight and narrow was required, so they recorded the date of birth and parentage of these animals in a desperate attempt to keep their aristocratic owners honest. Incest is good. The breeding policies of the upper classes, when applied to their pets, mean they deliberately force their animals to mate at a level of co sanguinity that would be illegal if they practised it themselves, father/daughter, uncle/niece, anything goes if you call it line breeding. Such a shame that the actual description is incest. The Thoroughbred is the fastest horse in the world. This may be true, but why won't they let any other horses run against them? The exclusive nature of the racing world would put South Africa's apartheid regime to shame except for the fact that the horses and pionies don't realise they are being denied equality on the basis of bigoted attitudes about birth and class.

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I am always advised to produce a nice simple web site that says what the Saddlechariot is and what it does, and if anyone knows how to produce such a website, I am listening. The Saddlechariot is a safe , fun, pony or horse drawn vehicle, accessible to all people and all ponies. The Saddlechariot is hated by the British Horse Establishment who refuse to look at the Saddlechariot or talk to me or even answer recorded delivery letters. To understand how a safe, fun, people friendly, pony friendly vehicle can attract the sort of vitriolic abuse it gets from people who have never looked........you need to understand the Philosophy .
Before we get onto the Saddlechariot and what it does, lets look at the people and ponies who will use it.

People love ponies and ponies love people. People includes all members of Homo sapiens, ponies all members of Equus caballus.
All Homo sapiens can interbreed, and have, and the result is you and me. I cannot in law discriminate against any of you, my readers, on the basis of parentage or physical conformation. If I insist on White, Anglo Saxon, able bodied, employees or customers I will be prosecuted.
All Equus caballus can interbreed and have, and the result is our ponies and horses. I will not discriminate against ponies and horses on any basis that would be illegal if applied to their owners.

Henry and I have just been working in Balsall Heath at the St. Paul's Trust City Farm. I call it working, but it was pure magic to watch the pleasure that Henry can spread just by being there. Henry was mobbed wherever we went, by all ages, all backgrounds. And over and over I was told "At home we had........" and home was Jamaica, or Yemen, Iraq, China, Ireland..............

With fuel going through the roof, and Global warming in every headline, pony power is the answer. For recycling projects, street cleaning, local deliveries, pony power makes cold economic sense. The goodwill in the community, something that unites all communities with a smile, that's just a free bonus, but may be worth more than all the other factors combined.

I was told endlessly that Henry was the first pony most of these kids had ever seen. That is a truly tragic statistic, but we can do something about it so easily. Bring ponies back to the cities, back to the people where they belong and always have. Ponies are urban animals.

Cities are full of statues to War Horses, as they ride roughshod over the vanquished, but those aren't the horses that people love. Millions remember the milkman's horse with real affection yet those have no statues. Possibly because no bronze monument could replace them, only flesh and blood will do. Henry is making a start and the Saddlechariot allows him to work safely in cities, on the beaches, at the Royal Cornwall Show. HRH the Princess Royal can look at the Saddlechariot, but Riding for the Disabled of which she is Patron have for 8 years refused to look at any vehicle I build or even talk to me. And if you want to know why, ask them, as I said they refuse to talk to me. The page on people may explain why.

class re;ationships